RUMINANT OF GOLD AND LAUGHTER GRAÇA FONTIS: PAINTINGS Manoel Ferreira Neto: PROSE

The sky, of a profound blue, is stained here and there for clouds of a more profound grayish darkness than the fundamental blue of an intense cobalt and for other clouds, although smaller, of a clearer blue as the child´s whiteness little diapers, the milky ways blueish whiteness. In the blue fund scintillate clear stars, greenish, yellow, white, roses garnished of gold and of laughter, of diamonds and precious stones or perhaps more as our precious stones, opals, emeralds, sapphires.

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The images happen to an extraordinary rhythm, voluntary rigidity in the sense of going uniting them, without letting lose a very singular characteristic, its plainless in the seduction and in the conquest, the forms simplicity not sound of tune of discreet and refined harmonies. What more frightens herein of contemplating all life situations and circumstances, create them again, turning them attitude and generosity, however to tell only of "sweet" and "chocolates" doesn't do a style that seeks and works reality in the sense of reaching Life, and not only its sense. The pure hypocrisy is a doll that we care every day, yes, and anybody can deny its dimension, because that thus loses the poetry of following a traquil and dew boulevard with its attitudes. To rumine gold and laugh, I build with hands, these hands are the intellect object, life that I wish to live. It would be said that now there is in everything old gold, bronze, copper, and this with the grayish, excessively harmonious blue, with tones of reflexes.

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If after forty years of delivery to my writing, even with few published works, hadn't learnt to work with the words, put them to the service of basing and to accomplish Life, would certainly have stopped of doing it, not just because I wouldn't manage to survive, yet exists the fact that anything has sense. I breathe pure air the full lungs and am me happy. Here I live free, I´m not oppressed by the indifference and laziness and hope be my last harbor. With effect, what it runs it is the laziness and the indifference of people to be sincere, authentic, it has the impression of being in the bleachers of a circus of a worse category; when finishing the show, it ruminates gold and laugh. It is life that I write of memory in the own picture that I draw.

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Of what it advances then the words, the senses, the meanings? Of anything advances. Certainly. They serve to play - well, for it is me to play, spend time until in a few minutes, when already imagine that didn't remain anything else to register, when I have acquired the wisdom that the lasts possibilities belong to time and to the eternity.

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My lady doesn't accept that I use this language, simbolize it, metaforize it, but it is the destiny of all of the men, to the final remains a tomb in the city cemetery, a cross with the name, date of birth, death date, for some the mausoleums refinement, of the architectural constructions. Suddenly, my lady knows that the words will be expressed once in a while, but dressed of a refinement larger, of another sense, but, yesterday, I said to her not to forget the pillow for the eternal sleep. I don't manage to sleep without pillow.

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I feel me smiling with the mouth corners. The only thing that the watch symbolizes or means, filling, with its presence, hours, is the curious and insipid sensation of filling the day and night with the hours presence. The whole porch explodes of an intense presence, someone there, flagrant I perceive him, I can´t see anybody. A vacancy raises, invisible and big, when balancing my eyes by the horizon, I feel fine, I experiment a song that appears me on the ears. That feel summer - unpleasant, because it is hot; bothered, for being tiring, - thus, because I thus am it, is just that it is my duty to feel him.

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Spirit of sacrifice? Self-denial carried to the extreme. Or incurable ingenuousness of that whose choice if fixed in the attitudes that judges the simplest - there isn't company with someone, it isn't simpler to stay in silence with the person, keeping the convenient and intelligible distance, respecting their right and duties; I don't manage to imagine other. Intelligible and convenient isn't to ruminate gold and laugh, but the ruminant be the wish and the gold wish and of the laugh. This simplicity appears to the eyes of all as the intrepid, as the paradox, of a position and decision in life.

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It is necessary to wish to be authentic in a fight and that most demonstrates a total indifference; when we dare us to that, it is necessary to feel by force of being something in our time, it´s necessary to be active, to we dare to tell if not to stand; I go where others had gone, those ones who durst.

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Nothing is told or else in hours where no one wonder to realize the men presence and when someone feels a reality enormous distance. And to immediate that emits the words anything warns that the divine windows close somewhere, the infernal doors are always opened. Men are absurdly greedy of silence, for this reason of inconsequence without limits; among them they don't shut up in front of the unknown. The superhuman truths instinct prevents of what it is compromising to shut up in front of someone to whom does not wish to know or from that doesn't be liking; the words pass between men, but the silence, had the opportunity of becoming dynamic, there isn't how to deny its unconscious dimension, not vanish, never becomes empty itself, and the truth-life, the only that inscribes its steps and traces, is made of silence.

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Only men who didn't develop the perspicacity of reading the words carefully, without prejudices and discriminations, can't see that the intention belongs that can work a sentence in many texts, and in each one of it it will have another sense and meaning. These sentences, effect calls, are born in an unused instant, it doesn't realize its proximity, and it´s necessary to be the very attentive for to register as it arises. It arose: "The pure hypocrisy is a doll that we care every day".

#RIO DE JANEIRO, 22 DE ABRIL DE 2020, 20:54 a.m.#